What do we do with time on our hands?
Um, nothing. Apparently.
Last week, I went to a pop-up event at the local Westfield with one of my dear mum friends.
While the event itself was simply an in-person chat between two of our favourite podcast hosts—featuring a little bit of sponsored fashion and food on the side—it was lovely. And to be honest, it was nice just to have an excuse to do something different on a dreary Friday morning besides the usual wrangling of children to daycare/the park/the supermarket and then home again.
What made it even more enjoyable however, was that my friend and I booked a babysitter for the morning. I know—organised. While from the outside this may seem somewhat extravagant considering we were simply popping down to the local shops for the morning—we knew we wanted to be able to enjoy the event and actually listen to the chat without any distractions (read: children climbing up our legs and/or causing a scene). And in hindsight, it was absolutely worth it.
But when the event happened to finish a little earlier than we had anticipated and we found ourselves standing in the middle of the mall with a whopping 30 minutes up our sleeves before we had to be back for the babysitter, we were like two stunned possums in the headlights. We didn’t know what to do with ourselves.
For context, had I not had other commitments already locked in for the afternoon I would have happily grabbed my friend and headed to the pub to enjoy a nice long lunch—sans children. But with such an awkward window of time on offer, all we could muster was a quick whip round one of the shops before heading home, early.
While the experience certainly gave us a giggle, more broadly, it highlighted to me how as mums, we are so used to running our lives based on someone else’s schedule that when we are thrown a measly half hour to do literally anything but ‘parent’, we feel like a boat without a rudder. Even as someone who would describe their parenting style as more ‘go with the flow’ than ‘authoritarian’—my days are still tethered to a routine dictated by my youngest child. From ensuring they are getting fed at round about the same time every day (because hangry children are hellish), to constantly questioning whether they’ve been awake too long/not long enough and whether it’s time for a nap—there’s no avoiding the fact that children (especially small children) relish routine. And as a result, my wants, needs and to-do list have no option but to fall into line.
Although I can zoom out and recognise that as a family, we are still deep in the trenches of babyhood and toddlerdom—and surely, as our children get older the structure of our daily existence will continue to become more dynamic and fluid—this small glimpse of freedom that was afforded to my friend and I last week also made me realise how much I’m craving a calendar filled with great expanses of nothingness.
But what the experience also taught me was that booking a babysitter is the ultimate #mumhack and really, we don’t need to wait for a special event to carve out space for these moments. Catching up with a good friend is a good enough excuse, so next time—we’re off to the pub.